711: Tesco Receipts

Medium: Paper, ink
Habitat: Shoeboxes
Favourite Breed of Dog: Dulux

Interesting Thing About Tesco Receipts: Cast your eye down your Tesco receipt and you’ll see a list of all the things you’ve just bought, followed by a nagging message telling you to hurry up and get a Clubcard because you’re missing out on 0.0001p’s worth of points, then a barcode, then some numbers. Numbers like this;

But what do these numbers mean? Obviously there’s the date, and the time, but what about the rest? Do they mean anything? Is it a secret code? Some sort of evil tracking system? Will you suddenly find yourself on an island, having to type them into a primitive computer every couple of hours in order to prevent the destruction of the planet?

The answers are Yes, Sort-Of, No and Not Yet. The numbers each have a meaning. The first is the Store Number. Fingers crossed there’s a society of Tesco-spotters whose aim in life is to track down store 0001. And fingers double-crossed store 0001 turns out to be a mucky bookshop. Next is the Till Number. And if the Customer Services desk isn’t till number 666, it bloody well should be. Third is the Cashier ID, which may come in useful if you happen to fancy the girl who served you but whose name is proving an awkward rhyme for the Valentine’s card (“Oh cashier 9075, you make me glad to be alive”, etc) (although in this case it wouldn’t work because the above receipt is from a self-service checkout) (mind you, considering the above receipt is for one cheap frozen pizza, it’s probably safe to assume the phrase ‘Self-service’ would sum up Valentine’s Day quite well).

Oh, and the last one’s the Receipt Number.

The pizza was quite nice, by the way.

Score: 7/10

Interesting Thing About Bruno Mars: Bruno once wore odd socks for a whole day without realising! Fortunately one sock was dark grey whilst the other was charcoal, thus minimising the risk of anyone noticing. He also had quite long trousers on that day. And he didn’t leave the house either, so nobody would’ve seen.

Score: 3/10

Result: Tesco Receipts win.


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